Its not like im emo-ing... its not like i dun have friends... its just that... i dunn think im a true friend to my friends... how??? stimes i think i see their pain, but they say they r not... so im suspect myself for thinking too much... bbut... when it comes to them crying out loud or wadever... i want to help them... comfort them... but... i cant seem to do anything... i always feel helpless... like i dunno how to help them.... seriously... think im gg burst le... mentally.... wan help but cant.... wad's wrong wif me???
and i realised... im not being myself when i am with most of my friends... what's wrong? i aso dunno... Just that... im like faking my days with them as someone else... to try to make them happy... and i cant carry it on... occasionally, i'll lose mytemper... i cant keep this up... how to be myself??? i dun even know wad i m... wad is the real me??? 0.0 i got no idea... but if i dunno , who will know??? alamat... im confused by myself... how can that be???
and then ive been very slow and unmotivated this days... y?? slow... i dunno??? eat more fish... my mum would sae... would that help =.= ... unmotivated... i have not been revising these days... and then, when i try... its very sluggish... y?? i become more and more of a slacker???? i need motivation.......... waaaaa... and...then... i feel very lonely in sch... not as in my friend dun like me or ignore me... but... there are alot of things about them i dunno... and i dunno how to communicate wif them.... there's this huge gap.... and... another wide gap between me and my 'old' friends... i try to contact them.... but... it doesnt last long... like eg. shi chin they all... haiz
this is a place for me to scream????
eehui |
